January 2011
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The Afghan Whigs, Gentlemen Hangover music.
Hungover.
Wife just came back from the store with a fountain Coke.
I need to renew my vows.
Dascola: Re my shoes
The LL Bean boots as recommended by Put This On.
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WatchMark Visser surfing a 35-foot wave at Jaws IN THE MIDDLE OF THE NIGHT. Seriously, it’s 2:00am and he has submarine lighting technology strapped to his body with a wall of water behind him. Balls.
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I'm listed in Tumblweeds under drink, drank, drunk
I’m listed in Tumblweeds, a user-generated community directory that rates Tumblr bloggers by their number of followers. Find me listed in #drink, #drank, #drunk
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I inadvertently had 460 mg of caffeine this...
We have a sick child, so I did something I don’t normally do and drank an energy drink before I left the house. I had no idea that the double-serving can (80mg) was actually 160mg. Forgot about the energy drink and used a giftcard for a double Cinnamon Dolce (150mg x 2). Drank the fuck out of that. Now I’m working on a spreadsheet and I think I discovered the meaning of life.
"He's puking on the toilet."
M: Why didn’t he open the lid? H: No, while sitting on the toilet. M: Be home soon. I saw our son lick a doorknob the other day. He did it without reason. It was there. My first live virus birth. I witnessed the creation of life. Millions of lives, in fact.
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Four people in a bar.
A guy walks over to the juke and everyone groans internally. He plays the Bowerbirds and we’re relieved. This is why day-drinking trumps anything that happens after midnight.
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A scene...
The first time I watched a skateboarding session with our four-year old son. H: He fell hard! M: Yep, that’s a pretty hard trick. H: Buhwhy is he going back up der? M: To try it again. H: [long pause] Buhwhy? H: To see if he can. Our son cocked his head to the side and cracked a small smile, probably because he wanted to see him fall again, but I’d like to think it was because he...
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"I'm starting a hospice cruise line so we can...
The woman that sits behind me is getting chemo for her mama llama, but she’s keeping her spirits high.
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Picture the Rockbiter saying, "These loooook like...
Now picture The Situation as a senior citizen depressed about the current state of his abs. Thinkin’ bout weird shit on a Wednesday morning.
"I think you drink too much."
-Sobering things I’ve said to friends after they suggested we split the tab when I’ve had four Jamesons and they’ve had five bottles of Veuve. I’ll go A&E on your ass and make you feel guilty about overindulging before you make me feel like I enjoyed your horrid vegan restaurant.