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I always wanted to buy this garage and turn it into a house. Hydraulic lifts would operate the bar and pool table, of course.

I always wanted to buy this garage and turn it into a house. Hydraulic lifts would operate the bar and pool table, of course.

Can’t figure out which is scarier, the plate or the shirt.

Can’t figure out which is scarier, the plate or the shirt.

Puppy Update: Still an idiot.

To My Father at 70 Years,

I have never been more fearful of the future in which my wife and I are raising our child, more uncertain of the career and the professional choices I’ve made, or more doubtful of the instincts and detours I’ve carved, such bumpy gravel paths that resulted in crippling debt, motorcycle rides, and small dog purchases. I have, however, been blessed with a father for almost four decades of my complete life; a man that taught me I am my own compass and while my magnetic poles are often a Bermuda Triangle of judgement, love and family will always guide me north.

You inspired me to find the right woman — through 45 years marriage thick and vomit chemo thin — to spend decades of laughter and tears with a supportive partner. You raised me on principles of right and wrong, embedding a sense of guilt in my heart long before I was ever caught. You pushed me, and I’m still being pushed, by the hard working example I watched in my youth, never giving into the fear of the our future but trying to make certain first aid kits were available when needed.

You did everything right and I am forever in your debt.

I love you and the life you gave me, my mother, my brother and sister, and our son. That alone quiets my fears to let me see the day after next.

Happy Birthday, Dad.

Soccer practice pro tip.

Soccer practice pro tip.

Ball licking deterrents.

Ball licking deterrents.